As I sat down to write this evening, I was sure that I was going to have a great message to talk about. Instead, I have ended up with a blank brain. So, instead of writing about how awful my week was, and how everything went oh so wrong, I'm going to sit here and explain how my week went, the good, the bad, and the ugly.
Everything started on Saturday when Adam came home from work and woke me telling me that our van had been vandalized sometime between 6:00 Friday night and 8:00 Saturday morning. Yes, our van was one of the 12 that had it's windows smashed in.
Monday night, someone decided to run a red light and ended up colliding into my new car that we just purchased in April. Our niece Allie has been staying with us while she goes to school in Augusta, and her and Molly ventured out to Target, and ended up in an accident. And, the weird part about this whole thing is that not one ounce of me is upset that some one else's lack of patience totaled our new car. Yes, our new car has been declared a total loss. No one was hurt though, that is the amazing part of this whole story.
Wednesday Shylah was supposed to have a follow up appointment with her doctor because she has been dealing with an ear infection and pneumonia. Well, they scheduled us with the wrong doctor, so that got postponed until Monday.
Last night I left Willow's electric heater running all night, with her door shut and a blanket sleeper on her. Needless to say, she woke up very early this morning sweaty and thirsty.
Today, I worked 1/2 a day and then had the van window replaced.
That was my week at a glance. How, after all that going on, can I still be o.k. with everything? I'm exhausted, yes, but it makes no sense to sit here and grumble when there is absolutely nothing I can do about it all. Can't take the baseball bat out the person's hands, I can't make it so the light was still green, or that the nurse had scheduled Shylah with the correct doctor. And I certainly couldn't change the weather so that it hadn't rained until after the window was replaced in the van.
So, with tired eyes, one less car, and a wet behind, I have figured out that prayer actually DOES work. I am not one to pray for patience and anyone that knows me knows I believe that the odds of God not giving you the opportunity to be patient is slim to none, and I'm not willing to take that chance. But, when I go to Him just open and fully aware that I need His guidance, understanding, grace, and wisdom, it comes with such abundance that it's over flowing. I am not saying that I have not raised my voice to my children, because I certainly have tonight, but I am saying that with everything going on, I'm still at peace with it all.
And that is not from my own doing. I am not one to sit back and let things happen without a good fight, but, I guess I have finally waived the white flag.
I am not strong enough to do this on my own. When we finally lay it all on our Father, things don't seem as big. Sure, we are a car short and penny-less, but, we weren't promised perfection in THIS life. And sometimes we can sit and dwell on things while we hang out on our pity pots, or we can go to Him and rejoice that we can actually get off our pity pots and flush.
I am so thankful that I have a great family, great in-laws, a great group of friends, and most of all, an all knowing, all powerful Father! He knows how I feel, He knows that I am so at awe about what has happened lately that I look up at Him and ask "ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!" But, I have to remember that through the struggles, there is a lesson, there is a story, there is a testimony, there is a reason.
So, as big as my struggles feel, there is a God standing right beside me climbing that mountain with me. Telling me that everything is going to work out, not to worry, He's got my back. He'll carry me through the nasty swamps and mucky waters. He'll be my shield in the battle of life. That through all this, there is bound to be something much greater on the other end. That no matter what the week looked like, it is just a milli-second of time compared to what I have to look forward to with Him.
I hope you will join me in standing strong with Him during our crazy, undesirable life moments.
Because of Him,
Michelle
